Im headed to the library tomorrow to
figure out some numbers to give my Dad...yes I just got news that im
going to see him for the first time in 10 years..im scared as hell.
Is he going to recognize me? Will he be happy with who I turned out
to be? I dont know...but I will on Saturday. And the most important
thing right now...will he help me with collage. God knows he has
enough money that hell just have to give up a weekend retreat and a
new suit and he could completely pay for it. I hope he will cause my
mom has a hard enough time just with the bills. It sounds selfish to
think that money is so important here. But it is. This determines my
future. Im scared of getting to emotional...or maybe im not scared of
that...maybe im scared that he wont really want me. But I cant worry
about that now. He fooled around on my mom, hes a wanker..and if he
ever reads this. This is what I have to say. Ive forgiven you a long
time ago for everything you put us through, for not being there when
we needed you. Ive never been able to call anyone else Dad. The truth
is: you are my dad. Now its up to you to decide if you want to step
up to the plate and act like one.
I dont know why ive made public my
most private thoughts. But I made a promise to myself. This is going
to be 100% real and true. And maybe..just maybe one more parent will
understand their daughter. I know I wish mine would...and I know
someday they will.
No comments:
Post a Comment